Age Regression

I talked to my mom last night and she wanted to know why I sounded so funny. I told her that exams were looming on the horizon and I was getting more and more anxious about it.

I could hear her rolling her eyes through the phone.

"Loco, honey," she said, "I've been going through exams with you and your sister for nearly three decades now. It's always the same before, during and after. I hear the same things. Oh, no, Mom, this time it's different. These kids are smarter. These exams are important. All the tests are sooooo different and special. It's funny how the results are always the same with these new, different, extra super duper hard tests. You always do at least as well, and more often than not, better than everyone else. You're almost (insert your idea of really old age here) years old. Haven't you figured that out yet? Or are you still smarter than me and know everything and I'm still always wrong?"

She continued....

"Loco, these are essay exams. You've been winning writing awards since you were eleven. Your first writing thingy in law school was used as an example of a good memo. Stop worrying and just keep studying. Plus, you're really cute. (Her solution for everything.)"

I responded by slamming my bedroom door and turning up my music really loud. She doesn't understand. These tests are really hard. They're really, super important. Everyone is soooo smart.

Like, totally.